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07 December 2010 @ 09:32 pm
That Authentic U-Boat Experience!, a.k.a. *splish*GRR*splish*  
So, not only has the flat been really sodding cold thanks to malfunctioning boiler for the past three months, tonight I was alerted to something odd by Sabre, who was staring into the kitchen in finest "on point" mode. (Well, I say "alerted": I muttered something indulgent about him being a silly bugger, hopped over to the kitchen door, and then swore loudly.)

What I'd assumed was the noise of rain spattering on the corrugated plastic roof of the lean-to outside was in fact water pouring through the ceiling in two different places - one of which is directly through the kitchen light fitting.

I deposited saucepans and bins and jugs at strategic locations, and shouted up the stairs for TenantUpstairs, assuming he'd left his bath running or similar. After he'd done some poking around in his flat, turns out we actually have a good old-fashioned water leak from t'pipes, which has started up top in his flat and decided to drop into mine for tea and biscuits. I am now very damp and soaked in patches from crawling about on the floor trying to catch Leak #1, passing back and forth under Leak #1, being sprayed by Leak #2 (perfectly positioned as it is to stream merrily down the kitchen window glass, and deflect off the surface in a graceful spurt), and thrashing about in floor-level cupboards like a salmon whilst attempting to locate and turn off the stopcock.*

It's like bleeding Das Boot in here!

Water is slowing (and has now almost stopped) since I shut off the stopcock. TenantUpstairs rang landlord. Apparently someone is coming out tomorrow.

This still leaves us with NO WATER till tomorrow (with the exception of the considerable amount splattered around our respective kitchens).

I'm going to fill the kettle (for washing and tea purposes) from whatever extent of puddle might be left in the tank, and the garage next door is 24-hours, so extortionately-priced bottled water is still available to me should I find myself suddenly dehydrating. Managed to save my potted herb plants: I felt like Leon as I hauled the basil off the windowsill and pushed it to safety on the shelf.

:contemplates wringing out jeans into kettle:


:wanders off attempting to tidy up for plumber coming tomorrow:

* A WORD FROM OUR SPONSORS: Said location and manipulation of stopcock was made possible by the all-round marvellous derien , without whose gift last year of a wind-up electric torch I would still be flailing blindly and soggily in the dark. ;)
kryptydkryptyd on December 7th, 2010 10:05 pm (UTC)
Ugh, that sucks! I found a slug in my kitchen today which I think means there's a hole in the wall somewhere (probably around the pipe the goes out of the washing machine) but my travails pale in comparison to yours!
Matt: planteor on December 7th, 2010 10:26 pm (UTC)
*hands you a towel* Remember to save some water for Sabre.

Now we must get you out of those damp cloths, you'll catch your death.
burningmarlburningmarl on December 7th, 2010 10:33 pm (UTC)
oh my lord that sounds like a total nightmare!
Kathie Dkathie_d on December 8th, 2010 06:29 am (UTC)
Hah! I just saw you commenting on another one of my (completely unrelated) flisties. Eljay is such a small place, sometimes.

Diaries of a dolphinluckykaa on December 7th, 2010 11:14 pm (UTC)
You have my deepest sympathy. Leaks are severely NOT FUN!
sherlock2040 on December 8th, 2010 01:56 am (UTC)

Water going through light fitting = really not good! This has just happened to a coworker who was instructed to phone the fire brigade for advice, they wanted to come round straight away as it constitutes a serious fire risk.

Assuming you haven't already, but it's worth tripping off the power to the kitchen.

Hope it all gets sorted ASAP!!
red: john hurtredconverse on December 8th, 2010 03:49 am (UTC)
I love that where I work, we've been having occassional leaks through a light fixture for the last 5+ years (it's under a platform that has plants on it, and sometimes the guy who waters them gets a bit overzealous) and all we say is "oh, it's okay! The light's not on, so no problems!" D:
Kathie Dkathie_d on December 8th, 2010 06:27 am (UTC)

Rented accommodation, eh? *hugs* I've been there.
art_inthe_bloodart_inthe_blood on December 8th, 2010 01:35 pm (UTC)
Woah! *throws over life-belt, hipflask, and a dehydrated camel just for good measure* Good lord, you and household catastrophes. Did you piss off a gypsy once or something?
Curried Goat in a paper cupderien on December 11th, 2010 02:12 am (UTC)
Yike, how delightful! Glad I could be of some help. ;)